Welcome to my actual reality site (MARS -- since that is where men really are from, I am given to believe), so called because I basically don't believe in "virtual reality" any more than I believe in "jumbo shrimp" or "military intelligence." There is "reality," and then there is "unreality," just as there is Penn and then there is Teller.

         As a journalist and a journalism professor, I have had to adopt a hard line on reality. Unreality belongs to pop astrologists (whose every conversation begins with, "So, what's your sign, dude?") and drug-scrambled survivors of the '60s. I want my reality actual, not virtual, so, if you are an avid reader and believer in Carlos Castenada or Kahlil Gibran (or are a visitor from the Planet of Political Correctness, for that matter), this very likely isn't a place where you want to spend a lot of time.

         My vision for my home page is twofold. One, it should provide useful information for my students, their parents, prospective students, and the occasional nervous administrator or pun-loving lurker who is Bennett-surfing the Internet (if you caught the pun, you are a really old person). Hence the "Advising" and "Classes" buttons to your immediate right. Each of the "Classes" pages for individual courses that I teach at Franklin College will include a copy of the syllabus for that course, explanations of special projects undertaken for the course, study guides and hints for exams, and links to Web sites related to class topics and assignments.

         The third button, "Résumé," goes into more detail on my professional career than is possible here. The aim there is to satisfy the curiosity or concern of any prospective student or parent regarding the background/qualifications I bring (or do not bring) to my position as a professor here. Also, I would hope it will provide the same service to any person or organization that wanted to check out my qualifications for doing consulting work or conducting seminars for newspaper or magazine staffs on writing and/or editing, things I do on a regular basis (see next paragraph).

         The next button, labeled "Seminars," puts you on the path to whatever seminars, conferences, and the like I have or will be either conducting or attending in the near future or recent past, including information on the topics involved or, in the cases of past events, summaries of the new and interesting things I found out.

         Two, my page should provide some semi-useful fun for anyone who is looking for it. Hence the "Top 12 Lists" button, where (and this was physics professor Nick Steph's idea originally) you will find out a lot about me through my "personal favorites" lists of books, movies, records, student excuses, Zen sayings and the like. What is on those lists should tell you a lot about me, probably more than you care to know, through my personal likes and, by implication, my dislikes. Most of these pages include links to related sites (including Nick's "favorites").

         The next button, "Weekly Diss," is a blatant and unapologetic example of a journalist taking advantage of Web page privileges. I plan to diss (or should I say, "editorialize scathingly," in the finest tradition of American journalism?) somebody, some place, some thing, or everyone in general each week, whether in 25 words or 250. Think of it (and me) as Andy Rooney with his own teeth. The topics probably will tend to be media-related, since that is my primary area of interest and supposed expertise, and I may even find a few occasions to say something nice about someone (but probably not Geraldo Rivera) or something. [NOTE: This feature is now a blog at http://thinkoutloudoldprof.blogspot.com .]

         Still, by the end of the year, I expect to be able to ask the question Lenny Bruce always asked at the end of his act: "Is there any group I have not offended?" The answer presumably will be the same, too: "No."

         The last button, "Writings," should tend to serve both my avowed purposes through samples of the articles, columns, essays, book chapters and prose-poems I have written over the years. I am happy to say most of them have already been published in actual, not virtual, publications, and those that haven't are still searching the Web skies, as well as the postal black holes, for the keen eye of an astute editor.

         So, prod and pry around, enjoy, make suggestions or comments, and let's get to know each other here on the actual planet of MARS (we all know that red one in the sky is an illusion created by Hollywood special effects experts and the CIA, assuming you've seen both "Wag the Dog" and "Capricorn One"). Welcome to my (actual) world.